Never Ever.

Never ever marry a man who made you an option instead of a priority.

Never ever marry a man who used you as a shield/ excuse to get away from someone or away with something.

Never ever marry someone who had a combination of the above.

Never ever. But I did.

fuck SCREWED.

Just need a space to spam my thoughts because the exhaustion from everything is overwhelming enough to kill me.

I need to breathe and get away from all these crap.

Also, this is a reminder to self that it happened.

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Annie, Versace Lee.

The title made no sense (so was the day) but every 28 March marks the day that I signed on the dotted line. That dotted line that enabled me to be the legally binding person, liability to another party on this faithful universe.

It’s the wedding annieversacelee anniversary once again. Yay, I survived till this day, again. To be frank, I wasn’t keen to even wish myself, “many more years to come” because I never want to continue such life. The idiosyncrasy of independence.

So instead, I will wish myself, many more good years to come, as a mother and as a daughter (in-law). But still, thank you for the day. It was a day of joy years back but no longer joyful as the years past.

and I wonder, will my days/ years get better because I am closed to say, “Just f**k off from it.”

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And who doesn’t hope to take a longer break in life, but can one afford to? At least, I am conscious to my decision and did my part as a mother.

Bonus: The #ongsisters and I did a painting together including #matchathechihuahua for the #canonstickerjam contest (Check out via instagram and remember to like our piece).

Rage & Rethink

Note: I wanted to post this on 8 March but had put it as a “Draft” mode till now.

I guess everyone is now flying in rage upon the light sentence given to this MMA Instructor, Mr Paedophile Joshua Robinson. Do read his story HERE.

I read through some of the comments on Facebook and etc, people flew in rage because caning was not given but almost a decade back in Year 1994, a youth-then named Michael Fay was given a caning for vandalism. In case you guys think legislation changed as it’s too far fetched, let’s fast forward to a case in Year 2015, 2 German youths were given caning for vandalism.

To get that race issue out of the whole context and before this entry was ruled as discrimination, in this context, are we telling the whole world that VANDALISM is way more ferocious and deadly as per compared to Child-Rape/ Sexually Assaulting the Minors and worst, trying to sexual groom a six years-old? Wtf is this.

I google the meaning of “vandalism”.

vandalism
ˈvand(ə)lɪz(ə)m
 
noun
  1. action involving deliberate destruction of or damage to public or private property.
    “an act of mindless vandalism”

Wow, when someone sexually assault someone, he/ she caused destruction to one’s lifetime. And this “someone” who caused the destruction got a lighter sentence than someone who caused destruction to public property (Quote Michael Fay & 2 German Youths) in which the the public property can be re-paint/ overhaul and etc, to make it new again.

How can one re-paint or overhaul one’s destructed life?

How is this logical? I can sense the anger and deep rage as a Citizen and as a Parent point of view which sets me some thoughts. What-ifs one day, my daughter(s) tells me about what the six-years old told her parents? What would I do?

To be frank. Kudos to the parents who investigate further because I would say there might be a fair portion of parents who might just brush it off. Blame it on the “Take-for-Granted” mentality or “Kia-si” mentality.

Perhaps I should write a post, from a Parent’s POV and to perhaps create this/ a platform to understand and learn from others’ parents, as a whole to create certain support and rapport in educating our kids/ future generations.

It seems kind of true that Asians will always be more reserved in approaching the topics on birds and bees but kids are more liberal and open nowadays due to the available technology and so as parents, we should always take the lead to teach.

If not us, who else right?

Well, let me pitch.

Break, Free.

Did some soul searching.

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And realised that money can’t buy anything else than freedom and etc. Thus I decided to “hibernate” and rethink on the things I want to do, I want to be.

Sometimes, passion can’t make much money neither will principles but still, one need uphold integrity and dignity because it will enable one to walk far.

Resigned from my “job” after a month as it’s no longer suitable for me. Shall take my pace despite I know I need the dollars and cents to tide through after all, I can’t possible just  sit back and relax when I had mouths to feed.

Find it hard to get Angel Investors because somehow I feel indebted. May this year be kind to me.

x

Space

Space is something undefined, subject to one’s definition.

It could be 0.00001 millimeters away or it could be as holy as it holds the whole universe together. But something that I do not like, someone physically intruding into my space, my personal space that progressed a level of discomfort.

I need a job, but it doesn’t meant I need to give in to sexual harassment intruders. One should never be silent about it. Rebuked, resisted and finding a way to get out of that critical moment is crucial.

I do not wish to comment much but I want to ask all ladies to trust your instincts. Instincts that will give you tell tale signs of danger. Never give another opportunity to such scumbags, NEVER.

This job indeed gave me steep learning curve. VERY STEEP indeed.

Not Huat but Heng.

HENG AH.

Luckily, I am alright, hmm.

Had a brush with the stroke of bad luck this morning, or many many stroke of bad luck. Took Grabhitch and the car broke down halfway, at the expressway. Ok fine, one off incident… Fair enough.

Took a cab from AMK Expressway Flyover and halfway through the peaceful ride, at the red light at the traffic light, the cab was hit by a Toyota Harrier from behind and tahan, that was end of my 2nd ride.

Took the 3rd cab from the accident location which is 5-10 mins away from the office, I was flabbergasted. The battery was on the verge of dying and it travelled at 40km/hr and took 20 mins to reach my workplace.

Despite today, I did not need to pay for my ride as all the three drivers do not want to charge me. I still paid the No 2 Taxi Driver and No 3 Driver as a form of good luck and perhaps, it would be a blessing in disguise that I reached the office in good hands despite having a sore arm from the No 2. accident’s impact.

My sister reminded me how heng I was and also my brother reminded me of 7 million toto this evening. Perhaps, luck will be shining while I take on a positive note onto the approach in life. May I strike the 7 Million tonight.

“Sometimes, I need these bad times to make me appreciate the good times.”

Sometimes I wonder, what happened if this happened when I am in KL? Hmmm… Will be I panicky or whatever…

Perhaps not. However I realised PA trained me well enough to stay calm and compose sia. Sibei calm to be exact.

Day 2

It had been tiring and today, I had just gave my best shot at it.

The disorientation makes me dizzy.

And I had 3 months to prove it. Good luck.

And on parenting, I was wondering how did I manage to do all these, all these while. I really ponder.